PSSSSSTTT...Hey, NYC Guys on Tinder!
By Jeannie O'Conor

What's up with all the car selfies? They're unflattering and we don't care that you know how to drive. It just makes it more likely that you're NOT from Manhattan.

And don't you think we know you're bald(ing) when you post a shot that cuts you off at the top of your head? And what's with the group shots where you don't identify yourself? Are you trying to hide in plain sight amongst your bros and somehow preserve your anonymity? Because we girls are putting our shit out there, and you should, too, you wussies- unless you're married or in a relationship, which we know you are unless you post a real picture.

And another thing: we can't believe is that you continue not to understand that, although tinder pulls your photos directly from Facebook, you have the ability to select-or exclude-certain photos. Like the ones with your girlfriend or wife, or, worse, the shots of your children, who do NOT belong or deserve to be showcased on an online dating site sometimes known as the "straightGrindr". What's the matter with you guys? Pull yourselves together, man!!!

Also: we do not care that you participated in Tough Mudder. In fact, one shot of you doing some He-Man activity or rich guy sport is sufficient, thank you very much. Which brings me to an important point: we have no desire to see your creepy bathroom selfies. If you want to show us your ripped abs, please do- only use a shot of you on the beach or playing Extreme Frisbee. This not only demonstrates that you have friends, like a normal person, but also that you are not someone who gets off on taking naked pictures of himself in the bathroom!

One last thing: ENOUGH with the Ed Hardy t-shirts and weird boy-humor shots of you dressed up like a chicken or making a dumb face! If we wanted a frat boy or DJ Pauly Whatever , we'd go to the Jersey Shore, or some bar on Staten Island.

Thank you,

The Women of Manhattan

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