Dear John,

     Can you explain what goes on inside a man's head to make him capable of beating up his wife or girlfriend? What does he feel he has achieved afterward? Does he feel sorry? If so, why would he abuse again? Are there other types of abuse beyond physical abuse?

Signed,
Just Wondering

Dear Just Wondering

     Attempting to explain the psychology of an abuser is beyond the scope of this column. If you are in an abusive relationship (physical, sexual or emotional) please seek immediate assistance. The National Domestic Violence Hotline, 800-799-SAFE (7233) is a free service that will answer questions and offer guidance and support. You can also find a wealth of information on a variety of web sites, such as Womenshealth.gov, in their Violence Against Women section.

There is no shortage of help available, much of it free. So please take advantage of the services offered. Tolerating abuse, or denying that it happens, oftentimes leads to more mistreatment.

Thanks for playing,
John



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